Missed Call
by 9peggy
Summary: Hey, it's…it's me. I just called to say…I'm sorry….


_Saturday, 9:24 p.m._

_Two new messages:_

*_beep*_

_Hi, this is the Luther Dentistry calling to remind [Chell] that her appointment is on-_

_/skip/_

_*beep*_

Hey…it's me.

….Have you stopped breathing? Ha…that – that was a joke, not to be taken seriously. P-please continue to apply oxygen to your lungs…

Ah, so, you might be wondering how I'm calling you, or even _why_, for that matter. Would not blame you on that subject, of course, I bet you're bloody furious to hear my voice after so long. How long has it been? Two, three years? Hard to remember, really, if you've been floating in space where time doesn't seem to even exist. Not complaining, though, I get it, I get it, I had it coming and I deserved every minute, but the point is…

Well, I'm not exactly _in_ space anymore, if you've not figured that out yet. Bit obvious, though, isn't it, seeing as there aren't any pay phones in space. Yes, I was so desperate to talk to you that I resorted to using a _pay phone_….let me tell you, these things are_ not _disinfected in _any_ way. In fact, I believe the last guy using it sneezed all over the place…eugh, best not think of that fact…

But…really, once I think about it, it's absolutely worth it. Just to talk to you. Seriously. Though I would have preferred it if you picked up…though, then again, once I started talking, you'd probably would just hang up on me, that is the…the sensible thing to do. In fact, you most likely have already deleted this message. Wouldn't blame you, I mean, it is a bit difficult to try and listen to me babbling on like an idiot, because that is the only thing I'm good at, right? Babbling and…and screwing things up. Pathetic.

But – but in case you _are_ still listening, could you just…hold tight? For a few minutes? Just – just hear me out, please. Promise it won't take up much of your time. Not that I have much of a choice otherwise, seeing as I've only got a few quarters to keep this thing running...

Oh, yes, I imagine you'd be curious to know exactly how I got back down to earth. Bet you're wondering how I managed to get your number, too. Ah, hopefully that didn't make me sound too creepy for that wouldn't help my case whatsoever….but – but at least it's someone you know, huh? Not just some total stranger…a stranger who didn't try to kill you out of power…ah, yes, anyways, back to the original conversation…

Look…I'll just cut to the chase…I called because…because I wanted to say…

. . .I'm sorry . . .

Really, I am most defiantly, infinitely, sincerely, genially, along with countless other honest-y words ending in '-ly', _sorry_. And not just because I was stuck up in space…. Y'know, here's an interesting fact, while I was up there, d'know what I wished for? I wished I could take it all back. I honestly did. I was sorry that I was bossy, and rude, and pushy, and…and, well obviously, positively _monstrous_. And…and I just wished for so long that I could _see_ you again, and talk to you to tell you how _sorry_ I was. Of course, you probably wouldn't have forgiven me, which, like I said, I wouldn't have blamed you. I mean, if it was me in your place I wouldn't have offered forgiveness. Not – not saying you should choose that option, but still…

And I know what you're thinking; why should I listen this tosser? Well, I've changed! Honestly! In more ways then one!...Eh, yes you should probably be informed about that…I'm not an AI anymore. I know, hard to believe, but I'm being truly honest here. It's sort of a long story, and an android body might have been involved, but I'll explain everything once I see you again…erm, that is, _if_ I see you again…Which I hope that I do. And I can not stress this enough, I **_really_** hope I do. See, wasn't able to stress it out enough.

But I really have changed. Not just in appearance, I've…as ludicrous as it sounds, I've had a change of heart. I think it had something to do with being disconnected to…to _Her_ body, but…

Oh, wait, no, I take that back. Well, I partially take that back. I'm not trying to shift the blame, or anything, but it did have something to do to being connected to that Place, don't you think? I mean, and I'm just throwing this theory out there, what if it wasn't _entirely_ my fault. Waitwaitwait, don't hang up, don't hang up!

Okay, if you are still there, which would be miraculous, but if you are, I should've chosen the words more carefully. Don't take everything I say seriously…well, _do_ take it seriously because I'm trying to be honest here, but…don't.

I'm just saying…when you're connected…it's like there's this _Itch_. This never ending, mind-boggling Itch that's just ringing in the back of your head, telling you – no, _demanding_ you – to test. And you never get a break from it, see, it just stays there, nagging you. Well…during that time, things got a bit…. fuzzy. I couldn't _think_ straight. Suddenly, testing just seemed like the best idea in the whole flippin' world, like I _had_ to do it and never stop. _She_ might have influenced it in some way, too, putting some…evil-ness in me…

But once I was disconnected and hurled into space, I almost immediately realized the mistake and how…bloody _awful_ I was to you. And I wished so many times that I could take it all back, erase all the mistakes. I started thinking about how things could have been if I'd chosen differently…

But, I know that's not the only reason, if it's a reason at all. It's my fault because I was…power mad. Funny thing, power, isn't it? I mean, not really funny in _our_ case, but it is an odd feeling…Truth is…I've never felt power before…

When I was activated, the first thing the scientist did was laugh, and make fun of me. 'Let's all make fun of the idiot sphere to break down his self-esteem! We don't care; he doesn't mean anything in this life anyways! Life would be exactly the same if he didn't exist!'

…They were probably right. It took me several days to actually figure out they were laughing _at_ me, not with me…

Still hurt though. It's not easy being destined to be a moron, y'know. It's not like I wanted that in the first place. But when I was put into Her body, _everything_ changed. I felt so _powerful_, and you were so small from my position, and I felt like I could do _anything_…

You could learn to love a feeling like that, what with the life I've lived.

Naturally, I didn't want it to end. But I had to remember why we risked going into Her chamber in the first place; to escape. The thing is…I didn't remember. You…as horrible as it sounds, you hardly meant anything to me at that moment. Why would I go out to the world if I had all the power I needed in _There_? I was so happy for myself, like I had finally done something _right_ for a change…

But then you didn't look happy for me, and…to be honest, I wanted to _kill_ you for that. I think it's because your opinion on my actions seem to matter most... I don't want to kill you anymore, obviously, now that I'm out. I think that's when the 'evil' setting kicked in. But now…I'm just so _sorry_. Do you understand? Is any of this getting through to you? I'm trying to make it as believable as possible, because it's _true_.

I promise we'll see each other again. Well, I'm presuming you wouldn't want to, after what I did. Actually, as I've previously stated before, I'm getting the idea you might have hung up long ago, which means that I've wasted all this time for nothing, chatting on like the moron I am about the apology that mean nothing to you, and therefore you do not wish to hear it…understandable, yes, but still depressing. But I'd _like_ to see you again. Even if all it'll accomplish is the door being slammed into my face, I'd still fancy a short chat just to tell you face-to-face how sorry I am. Because I do mean it. You deserve at _least_ that much. And I don't know how or when we'll be able to…but I'm making this promise to you. And I'll keep it. You want to know why?

It's all I have left, love.

And remember all the good times we had? Like….like when I told you to say apple, and you just jumped? Or – or when I told you to catch me when I fell off my magnetic rail…annnd you didn't. You just let me crash to the floor. Yeah, those were the days. Though…come to think of it, we didn't have many 'good times', did we? I mean, what with between trying to escape and shutting her down, we didn't have much time. But if we did…do you think we'd have more memories? Well…I suppose we can…if we ever see each other again and you forgive me. Huh…first time I've thought about that, actually. I mean, you're amazing at so many things, and I'm…well, I'm a nice old bloke, aren't I? D'you…d'you think we could have . . .

_/User has [one minute] left/_

Ah, yes, I suppose that's my cue to rap things up. Thanks, blasted pay phone, point taken. Way to ruin the moment…

Alright, I'm not sure where I am, or…or where you are, but we _will_ see each other. And once we do, you can forgive me like I'm hoping – I know, fat chance – or you can strangle me until my face turn a satisfying shade of blue. Fine by me, as long as you're happy. Just…just call back or…or something…it'd mean _everything_ to me…

…I want another chance…

Once again, _I'm sorry_. So sorry, that I feel like I have to invent a new word just to properly explain how incredibly _sorry_ I am. How about…sologyuilt. And yes, that is indeed a few words of what I'm feeling mixed into one…you can most likely figure that out on your own, with that stunning problem-solving mind of yours…

Hey…hey, before I go…I just wanted to tell you one more thing. I know, 'How long is this idiot going to keep talking?' But I promise this is the last thing you'll hear from me. Well…you're not going to believe this, I'm not sure I completely believe it myself, and as crazy as it sounds…

I . . . I love –

*_beep*_

_/end of final message/_

. . .

". . . You're . . . forgiven . . ."


End file.
